Proudly displaying our moral superiority since last Tuesday!
TrumpChange
$4.5000B
BAHAMAS — In what officials are calling “a minor clerical oversight with major geopolitical implications,” the Pentagon confirmed today that a military transport carrying detained migrants was mistakenly rerouted to the abandoned site of the infamous Fyre Festival in the Bahamas due to an autocorrect error. The intended destination: Libya’s internationally condemned detention camps.
The original flight order, marked “Send to Libya,” was allegedly auto-corrected to “Send to Billy”—short for Billy McFarland, the disgraced entrepreneur behind Fyre Festival, whose last known coordinates were tagged to a half-deflated VIP tent near Exuma.
Military logistics officers, apparently unaware, proceeded with the flight.
“We saw ‘Billy/Fyre’ in the system and assumed it was one of those covert acronyms for a black-ops detention site,” said Lt. Colonel Jeremy Stokes. “Turns out it was just a sand-covered stage and some goat cheese.”
Upon arrival, confused migrants were greeted by faded signage for Blink-182 and a gourmet sandwich made of Wonder Bread and Kraft Singles. “It was hell,” said one official. “But arguably still better than Libya.”
White House Press Secretary JD Vance defended the mishap, claiming it “still sent a strong message.”
“The message is: If you try to enter America unlawfully, we will send you somewhere so bad, it once broke Twitter.”
Vance later clarified that the administration will be “reviewing all autocorrect settings on military devices” and will “retrain personnel using a new app developed in partnership with Truth Social.”
While some conservative pundits praised the move as “an innovative deterrent,” critics were less impressed.
“It’s peak Trump,” said immigration lawyer Alejandra Ruiz. “You try to deport people to a war-torn hellscape and end up accidentally staging a reboot of Lord of the Flies with a Spotify playlist.”
Meanwhile, sources within the Pentagon report that next week’s deportation flight to “Doha” is currently logged as “Donda,” potentially rerouting migrants directly into a Kanye West listening party.
As a result of the error, DHS is reportedly exploring a new deterrence program involving playing Ja Rule’s greatest hits on loop during processing.